9780393705751 198

Love and War in Intimate Relationships

Connection, Disconnection, and Mutual Regulation in Couple Therapy


Marion F. Solomon (Author), Stan Tatkin (Author)

Our Retail Price:£24.99

Add to Basket


Neuroscience and couples therapy come together to help couples break patterns of bad behavior.

What happens between partners that makes love turn to war? How can couples therapists help deescalate the battles? Two leading therapists apply the latest neuroscience research on emotional arousal to help couples regulate each other’s emotions, maintain secure attachment, and foster positive, enduring relationships. The neurobiologically-grounded and sensitive approach set forth by Solomon and Tatkin in this book is sure to transform the way clinicians understand and treat couples in therapy.


"After completing the first reading of this wonderful text, this reviewer reflected that Maurice Merleau-Ponty, pioneering phenomenologist of the intersubjectively lived body, would have resonated positively to the deeply insightful thematic content and the creatively conceived experiential techniques and therapeutic experiments of this ground-scaffolding, psychobiologically informed text." — Journal of Phemonenological Psychology

"This book should be part of the working library of any clinician whose practice is informed by the ongoing paradigm shift in psychotherapy." — Allan N. Schore, PhD, UCLA David Geffen School of Medicine

"Reading this book was a sheer pleasure, and I did not skip a word. It is an artful theoretical and clinical integration with no wasted words....In this innovative couple therapy, they have documented the healing power of couples learning to take care of each other and put to rest the myth of the healing capacity of the autonomous self. I recommend this instructive book to all therapists....I hope this project gets lots of deserved attention." — Harville Hendrix, PhD, author of Getting the Love You Want

"I found this book full of new ideas for me, providing me with new thoughts, feelings and skills, even though I have been practicing therapy with couples for more than three decades. Simply put, this is the most transformative book on psychotherapy I have read in a long time." — CPA Newsletter: The Announcer

"What a gift! Solomon and Tatkin offer us the most illuminating and creative work on couples therapy to be published in a long time. Through a variety of cases, they artfully explain why loving partners go to war with each other and then give a fascinating demonstration of how to apply biology, physiology, attachment and arousal regulation in moment–to-moment interactions. This book will be stimulating, immediately practical and eye-opening no matter what theoretical orientation you use." — Ellyn Bader, PhD, Director, The Couples Institute

"A new lens on couple therapy, this book will revolutionize the way you work with partners and transform your view of relationships. The authors skillfully translate ideas from neuroscience, regulation theory, mindfulness, and attachment research into hopeful, practical and accessible interventions for working with the here and now experience of couples in therapy." — Pat Ogden PhD, Founder/Director, Sensorimotor Psychotherapy Institute, and author, Trauma and the Body

"For clinicians who are in search of practical examples to complement theory, the case illustrations offered by Solomon and Tatkin are a tremendous resource….[A]n easy and insightful read." — PsycCritiques

Also By: Marion F. Solomon View all by author...